Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Interim Report on Seasickness

As you know, I have been somewhat inner-ear-challenged on this trip.  Stylish and Indy have had the occasional issue, but I am a consistent mal de mer girl.  So although I have lots of fun when we arrive places, I’m afraid the getting-there isn’t all it could be.

Here is what I’ve tried so far.

1.  Dramamine, aka Gravol
Seasickness fighting power: 2/10
Adverse effects: 9/10

This stuff was plain terrible.  It robbed me of all intelligent thought, while leaving me in full possession of my blinding headaches and stomach upset.  The day I made the mistake of taking a full pill, Erik was unable to wake me for almost half an hour.  I fell asleep sitting up, for crying out loud.  So if you like to feel like your brains have been sucked out of your head and replaced with cotton wool, while simulataneously having all of your sinus cavities threaten to explode, this is the drug for you.

Hermes understands what I'm going through.
2.  Scopolamine patch
Seasickness fighting power: 8.5/10
Adverse effects: 7/10

Oh, scopolamine.  The patch was brilliant to start with.  I used it on the three-day passage from Key West to Isla Mujeres, and, for once, was in fighting shape  the whole way.  But then the itchiness under the patch started.  I developed an allergic reaction to either the drug or whatever they use to cross the skin barrier.  By the time we hit Isla and I took it off, I had a fiery red welt behind my ear that took weeks to heal.  An itchy patch I can deal with, but the patient information sheet carried dire warnings about allergic reactions leading to respiratory shutdown, and I’m less cool with that.   So, I’ll use this again in a pinch, but it obviously doesn’t like me, more’s the pity.

3.  Stugeron
Seasickness fighting power: 2/10
Adverse effects: 2/10

This was the holy grail of seasickness meds.  Everyone told me how great it was.  Banned in the US, it was bound to be good, right?  No.  It did nothing.  Nothing!

Like Radioactive Man, I'm a little disappointed.

It was like going out with your dream date, only to discover he is a dumb as a stick, secretly wears a hairpiece and still lives in his mother’s basement.  Truly, I was heartbroken. 

5.  Pressure point bracelets
Seasickness fighting power: 0/10
Adverse effects: 0/10

I think I spent too long in the sciences to have the faith required for this kind of remedy.  Enough said.

4.  Nothing + a nap
Seasickness fighting power: 3/10
Adverse effects: 0/10

Let’s face facts, boys and girls.  I’m pretty useless the first day out.  I can follow basic instructions, but my higher cognitive abilities shut down under the weight of my misery.  So, I might as well be asleep, right?  I can help with watches, ie/ make sure we don’t hit other boats and we stay on course.  I retain that level of smartitude.  And being drug-free, I am marginally more intelligent than on the stuff listed above (and, I have it on good authority, somewhat less crabby).  When it is Erik’s turn to keep watch, I sleep in the cockpit.  As long as I don’t venture into the dreaded Belowdecks, I can feel human for up to an hour after waking.  Pretty good, right?  Well, better than nothing.

This is where I call for help.  People.  This is your chance to shine!  You are smart and worldly.  You travel places.  You know someone with motion sickness.  And you have access to all the wonders of the intrawebs, which I lack via my trusty ham radio.  So help me out here.  I am ready to be a one-woman testing ground for any and all remedies, no matter how dubious!  I’m down to ginger tea on my list of Things People Swear Will Work.  Send me your magical answers.  Pretty please.  Be my hero!

Even Wonder Woman suffers during takeoff and descent.

No comments: